


Midsomer Playground

by Tiny_Dragongirl



Category: Midsomer Murders, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Cluedo, Don't take it too seriously, Fluff, Fun, Gen, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-17
Updated: 2013-01-17
Packaged: 2017-11-25 20:49:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/642828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tiny_Dragongirl/pseuds/Tiny_Dragongirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One day a strange old man visits DCI Tom Barnaby and soon he finds his house crowded with unknown children. Or maybe not that unknown.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Midsomer Playground

**Author's Note:**

> I built a quote from Tolkien's Hobbit in the story. I would like to thank J. R. R. Tolkien for it.

DCI Tom Barnaby had a lovely Saturday morning. It was the middle of May with the sun shining brightly and the air soft and sweet. He helped Joyce to pack into the car (Mrs McCauley, one of her friends invited her to spend the weekend with her because Mr McCauley went on a sporting trip and his wife wasn’t really keen neither on fish nor on being alone) then waved after her as she drove away.

When the car disappeared behind the corner of the street, an odd man approached the Barnabys’ house. Tom, still standing on the doorstep, took stock of him. The man looked old, so old he needed to lean on a staff. After all, grey-haired and long-bearded, he had a pair of elfish eyes.

‘Good morning!’ Barnaby greeted him. He didn’t know the man, he had never seen him before but he was in a good mood that morning.  
‘What do you mean?’ he said. ‘Do you wish me a good morning, or mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not; or that you feel good this morning; or that it is a morning to be good on?’  
‘All of them at once, I suppose.’

The strange man gave Barnaby a mysterious smile, tapped the door frame with his staff and continued his walk. Tom’s eyes followed him until the end of the street then he decided to go back to the house and do something nice.

But he couldn’t close the door completely behind him, when a little boy appeared in the ante-room and another one followed him.  
‘Ben, wait!’ The second one yelled but his friend didn’t listen to him but kept running.  
The two boys headed for the kitchen while Barnaby felt stunned. Where did these two children come from? And why on Earth did they look so familiar?

He decided to follow them. For God’s sake, it was his house.  
‘Boys...’ He stepped into the kitchen but they didn’t notice him. They were too busy trying to climb into the cupboard.  
‘Come on, Gavin, we need to hurry up before she finds us.’ She?! Barnaby wondered how many children had been wandering around his house. Two boys and a girl...  
A sudden thought struck him.  
‘Ben? Gavin?’ The boys looked up.  
Oh no.  
Tom opened his mouth to say something but words failed him.

‘Gotcha!’ Someone Shouted behind his back and he turned short. ‘Hello, Dad!’ Cully stood in the kitchen’s door with her hands on her hips. Fortunately he hadn’t gone completely gaga so he was still able to recognise his own daughter. Even that for unknown reason she turned back into her five years old version. She smiled at him then turned back to the boys. ‘You two! Don’t move, I caught you!’ The boys straightened and uplifted their hands with a resigned look on their faces. ‘That’s better. Dad, please, step out of the way. I need to arrest them.’  
‘What?’ Barnaby was swept off his feet in every minute.  
‘Dad, please, tell her not to arrest us!’ Gavin whimpered plaintively. He was about five, too, Tom guessed.  
‘Dad?’ Ben (probably six or seven years old but certainly not older) shot a questioning look at his friend.  
‘She called her Dad!’ He protested.  
‘But it’s not his name’ Little Ben Jones informed him.  
‘Tell him! Tell him that you are Dad!’  
‘Well, I am a dad but not...’  
‘You see?’ Young Gavin Troy triumphantly stamped on the floor. ‘He is a Dad so this is how I am going to call him!’  
‘You are trying to get off with your arrestment!’ Cully shouted desperately.  
‘Praise, someone tell me, what’s going on?’ Barnaby sighed.  
‘We are just playing, Dad. I am Detective Inspector Barnaby and I have to cage these two...’  
‘Cully!’ Her father warned her.  
‘I didn’t want to say anything nasty!’  
‘And why do you want to arrest them?’  
‘Because it’s their role. To be arrested.’  
‘We could arrest you, by the way!’ Ben snapped. ‘Previously you were the adventurous pirate captain and I bet you did some bad things. Don’t try to deny it, pirates always do what they are not allowed to do.’  
‘I won’t deny it because my pirate heart is proud of all those things I had done! And it’s Captain to you, you little sea rat!’  
‘Cully!’  
‘Argh, Dad!’

The three of them dashed out of the kitchen, roaring and shouting pirate-things like parrot, ships and death’s-head flags. Tom quickly followed them. He needed to keep an eye on the children while he could find out what was going on. Or until he would wake up from this weird dream. Or until Joyce would come home and tell him that he had gone mad.

The day went on and nothing changed. The children (his daughter and his deputies) played and quarrelled then played again. The game usually involved running and sometimes shouting, too. Once Barnaby managed to tricked them into playing Cluedo which kept them busy for at least half an hour.

Ben knitted his eyebrows as he placed the pieces on the board. ‘But why would the murderer drag the body to the middle of the house? He...’  
‘...or she...’ Cully threw in.  
‘...could simply leave him where the crime was committed.’  
‘Probably the murderer wants to confuse the detective.’ Cully shrugged her shoulder and picked up the red piece. ‘Can I play with Miss Scarlett?’  
‘Of course you chose her – she is an actress.’ Ben grinned. ‘Cully wants to be an actress!’  
‘So?’ The girl snapped. ‘And which one will you choose?’  
‘Colonel Mustard, probably.’ He smirked smugly.  
‘I know this one!’ Gavin became very excited. ‘They are in love, aren’t they? Because if they are, I say now that I don’t want to play wedding games after this and I surely won’t be the vicar at your wedding.’  
‘Why not? You could choose Reverend Green.’ Cully suggested. ‘You like green men, don’t you?’  
‘You would like to play wedding games if you could play the groom and marry Cully.’ Ben poked the smaller boy between the ribs with a mischievous smile on his face. ‘Anyhow, I think you should play Mrs White, the cook. You love to eat, plumpy.’  
‘Dad, it’s not fair! Please, tell Ben not to call me names.’

Tom rolled his eyes. Gavin was wedded to his opinion that Barnaby’s actual name was Dad. Maybe he was a bit younger than five years old. Otherwise, he was absolutely Gavin. Round, bright eyes, goofy smile and he might have complained about the two others, he was always eager to play and have fun. Ben liked to tease him because little Ben was a playful wee kid, ready to do some capers.

DCI Tom Barnaby never imagined to meet his deputies as children but he didn’t really mind it. He still didn’t understand the situation, but he enjoyed this small (and, he had to admit, cute) versions of his colleagues and the second childhood of his daughter. If it was a dream, maybe it was a weird but funny one.


End file.
